I lived with this inner turmoil for many long days. Amidst the dark tangle of confusion and fear in my mind, a clear inner pronouncement penetrated my being. It said, “If I make this decision based on fear, then today is the day that I begin to die.” I chose to listen to that, no matter how fearful I was. This vision was something important to me. I recognized that any rejection of it or even delay would be tantamount to me rejecting myself and my will to embrace life fully. I refused to do that to myself. No matter how foolhardy to embark on a world cycling trip which would be financially impossible, I owed it to myself to at least try and give it my best shot.
My decision was resolute to do everything I could for a positive outcome to fulfill my world cycling dream. I was firm in my resolve and certain in my convicition. Thinking practically, I decided that, as soon as my remaining savings dropped to $1000, then I would return to USA and work for income and proceed with life. I was 99% convinced that this contingency would happen after about one month. It seemed ridiculous to get started on a huge journey with the expectation that it would be a big waste because I would abort after such a short time. Nonetheless, I resolved that it was important to me that I at least try, because that was an indication of my will to follow my dream.